The art of letting go

Letting go seems to be the magic word when you are on a path to awareness. But how is it done? How can you let go when your thoughts continue to take over. When what was done to you, hurts so much. When it seems the anger won’t go away. When everything inside you says: I don’t want to let go, I want things to be different!

Often we are afraid letting go is the same as giving up. Giving up what you wish to be true: your deep longing for contact and connection. Letting go does not mean you dismiss your needs. Or that you lose contact and are left behind all alone. Letting go is about no longer wishing the reality were different from the way it presents itself. Letting go is about fully acknowledging the truth of the now. Nothing more, nothing less.

The raw truth of the now

You acknowledge someone has done something, which causes you pain. You acknowledge that the behaviour of your boss comes across as insensitive and bothers you. You acknowledge that you have a longing to be seen, but that the longing is not fulfilled. You acknowledge that this makes you sad. Period. No more stories about how things could be different, how things should be different, this is the raw truth of the now.

This acknowledgement requires being present in the now. Being connected to what is. To pain, anger, sadness, but also to your needs and longings. In this sense the key to letting go is paradoxically: allowing. Allowing everything to be as it is. Also the not knowing, the unknown.

Then something special happens. By fully allowing life to unfold itself in the now, you let go of your resistance to reality. And where resistance disappears, life energy can once again flow. You will experience space and peace. Space in all that is. Space in the pain, the anger, but also in your longing. Which is no longer constrained but receives all the space it needs. Because what you are doing implicitly, is making the longing yours and not someone else’s. Now you are in charge, not the circumstances. And whether you are met in your longing at this moment or not, is less important. Instead it is about honouring and embodying your longing. No matter what.

Furthermore, stay curious, remain open. Do not cease to be amazed at the way life unfolds itself. There is so much to receive, so much more to let in than what you attend to. Smile and be in joyful expectation!

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